Wednesday, August 28, 2013

Turning 30

Dress: Envie Boutique // Jacket: Ross // Headband: Vera Bradley // Sunnies: Fashion Bug (going out of business sale) // Earrings: unknown

Would you believe I turn 30 years old today? No, I don't feel old. I have not yet experienced that, although I can see and feel the changes in my aging body. I have smile lines around my mouth and crows feet forming around my eyes.

No. Today I sort of feel ... unaccomplished. It's hard to express this without pouring myself out to you. I keep thinking, I'm 30 and where am I? I have a failed a marriage, trying to raise three kids on my own; I am uneducated and possess no skills. Although Logan would tell you otherwise. He says if I can do it, I will. He calls me a self-made woman. I suppose in a way I am. I don't like depending on others to do things I'm capable of. I own a sewing machine to make myself and my children clothes. I loaded the moving truck on my own when I moved here. I do a lot. I suppose this is me being silly. We all have doubts and wonders on occasion, don't we?

Well, instead of me rambling on with my silliness, how about 30 things about me:
1. This is the longest my hair has been since I was seventeen.
2. Logan is six years younger than me. *gulp*
3. Despite three pregnancies, I have been the same size since I was 14 years old. No, it is not glorious. I'm 30 and have to buy clothes where fourteen-year-old's shop. *grimace*
4. Nothing "brought" me to NC, other than an apartment for me and my children. I moved solely on faith. God has been so good to me.
5. Right now I am eating egg and bacon sandwiches Logan is making me for a birthday breakfast. Cracker Barrel white cheddar cheese is amazing!
6. I'm 5'4".
7. My hair has grown back to its natural color.
8. I have had the same BFF since I was twelve. I love you, Candace!
9. I used to be a cheerleader. That's how I met Candace.
10. I had a dream the other night Logan was a scientist from the past and came to the future (our present) via my microwave. Three days later I am still laughing as my memory recalls watching him climb out, twisted up like a contortionist.
11. A year ago I was so unhealthy, underweight, and depressed my father cried at the sight of me. I feel so good today! My dad called last week and told me how good I looked in my latest FB photo. It delighted me to hear my efforts working on myself are paying off.
12. Logan says I can cook. Apparently I deceived him into thinking I couldn't.
13. I can thrift with the best of them.
14. Cheesecake!!!
15. Logan says I have to put that I have a great smile. We shall agree to disagree.
16. I have three awesome kids.
17. I named one of my kids awesome. I made Olivia's initials OSM so that when read allowed it would read as Awesome.
18. Nothing screams sold like a good coupon. I'm a coupon clipper!
19. I adore Audrey Hepburn. I watch "Breakfast at Tiffany's" on my sad days, can't sleep days, and days when I just feel like it.
20. I have three tattoos, one a large peacock down my back. It hurt.
21. Bacon!!!
22. I am still in search of the perfect red lipstick. Suggestions?
23. I happily drive Logan bananas!
24. I lose my temper with my middle child on a daily basis. 
25. Every time someone asks, "Where do you get all these creative ideas?" I respond, "Pinterest."
26. I love Downton Abbey.
27. I have a strong dislike for vanilla ice cream. 
28. I refuse to use the southern expression "we might could." It annoys me when Logan does.
29. I smack Logan a lot. He's a smart ass.
30. I love him!

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